This is bitter sweet. We are half way. WOW! I'm am not looking forward to our Meltdown session ending, but I do look forward to seeing how great everyone will look in 3 more weeks. I really see such a great change in how everyone is looking and how strong we are becoming. I would love to continue to meet as a group on an on going basis. I don't really know what that would look like, but would like to see if anyone else is interested.
Today we had a strong workout that pushed us all. I was determined not to walk on the 400 meter rounds that we did; it was my personal challenge. Sometimes I feel slower than the rest of the crew but feel that as long as I complete the workout it is my own. My own satisfaction and my own workout. I can't compare myself to others, because that isn't why I took this challenge. I'm trying to stay in the focus of truth. I have alot of history of bad self image.
In this journey I am riding a rollercoaster of emotion. I am a woman of faith and know that my life journey is about more than just me. I know that I have been through things that will help other women. I have always had bad selfesteem and acted out to make up for how inadequate I have felt about my abilities and inabilities.
Working through the physical part of the meltdown has helped with the emotional part of things. I have chosen to deal with my anxiety instead of going back on some medication. I feel that it is the right choose. Week 2 was the highest anxiety that I have felt in ages and I made it through. I did try a new med and realized that I didn't need it. I would rather feel anxious then nauseated.
I feel really great about working out 5 days a week for the past 2 1/2 weeks. I have so much energy. I usaully have sleeping problems but have actually been able to take a couple of naps over the past 2 week; that is almost unheard of in my world.
I am very thankful to Robert and Kili and appriciate the way that they work together as partners and a married couple.
See ya on Wedneday if not sooner,
Tracy
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