I'm not sure where to start.
Right now in my life I have college on Teusdays and Thursdays from 8am to 5pm. Every other day I work to pay for my phone bill and save up for school. Add in meltdown and sprinkle on all the homework, I don't know how I'm doing this. all I know is that I'm survivng and pushing myself pretty far.
This morning I really pushed myself in the work out. I had somewhat of an epiphany last night through a dream. Every night I dream, whether it be good, bad, or neither. However last night's dream I'll never forget. So here it is.
4:35a.m.
Enlightening, encouraging, relieving, and honest, was the dream I have awoken from.
I was in a large group of girls, my age (which is weird for me. Like, REALLY weird). I could tell you that by the feelings of maturity I had in this dream I was about 22. We were all auditioning for a lead role in a movie. A dream that I have had in my mind for while, but have never dreampt. It was extremely lovely weather and we were all outside auditioning for this role in what was going to be a huge film (No details of the movie or title were given). As it neared my turn to show the director and crew what I can do, I had no nerves. All of us girls were wearing white shirts and jeans. Our hair was done nicely according to what would best flaunt our personalities. No brunettes, only red heads, blondes, and strawberry-blondes. Since it was late summer, my freckles on my nose had come out of hiding and my hair was down. Not down and straight like I always do, but down and curly. In fact, right before I auditioned I took a moment to curl some loose strands. Because of these factors, I was shocked as an observer of my dream. These are all things that I never do: wear white shirts in fear that I look like a blimp, wear my hair down curly because it looks ridiculous, feel comfortable in a large group of girls.
My name had been called and it was now my turn to strut my stuff. As I stood from where I sat in the lush green grass, the girl next to me nudged my arm. "Don't forget to blush, they eat that up." I nodded in response as though to say, "Sister, the don't know what's comin'."
This is all so great to me for multiple reasons. One, this is a dream where I am pursuing something I know will always be in the back of my mind. In the process of executing it, not only did I feel like nothing could stop me, but I and everyone else for that matter, knew that. It was an aura I had seldom created for when I am so determined. In order to pursue a dream of this proportion, I need full confidence in myself and to overcome my bashfulness as well as how self-conscious I can get. I need to be proud of who I am and to prove to others that if they want great efforts and productivity done by a great worker, I'm the one they want. In my dream I had already obtained and honed this skill. I was using it very wisely. It felt so powerful and amazing. So why is this all relevant?
I woke up with the feeling that it will be mine. Just within a matter of time.
This is only a fragment of everything that rushes through my mind every day. However, SWEAT360 is not. I have made it part of my life, just as I would buying groceries. One of the best decisions that I have ever made for myself.
-Jamie.
Saturday, April 24, 2010
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AWESOME JAMIE! Thank you for sharing. You are so sweet and it looks like you are very talented and driven for sure! Thank you for helping to drive me yesterday. You are doing something that will help you for the rest of your life and you won't regret it. Looking forward to seeing your smiling face next class.
ReplyDeleteTracy
Yeah, Jamie, thanks for sharing that. I really appreciated all you put out there.
ReplyDeleteJamie, you rockstar. That was really awesome. Thanks so much for that! You are such an inspiration for other girls your age. They will know your name. x
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